My six-year-old daughter's first day at 'big school' and I'm aching with some sort of silly grief. It's not even as if she's been home with me upto now - other than during school holidays - but this is her first time in a non-Montessori, one teacher per class, proper school with lots of older kids environment. Her best friend from Montessori is with her and there are only 16 in the class compared to the 32 or so classmates I had at her age. I guess this is the beginning of her forging an independent life and I should be very proud that she IS very happy, confident and independent. It's just that I didn't expect to feel this way as I daily rail against being at home with my children - silently of course and to my husband when he is here - and hanker for the other me which I imagine could be happy, confident and independent in a workplace. Gosh this Mom stuff sure is full of surprises.